Thresholds: Moving From One Phase of Being to Another

This morning I was washing my face when I felt a sore spot on my cheek. Upon closer inspection I was somewhat surprised to discover that it was a pimple. I am almost 56 years old. And I got a pimple. In a wrinkle. Can we talk about that for a second? I know Mother Nature has a wicked sense of humor but come on. Seriously?

I have been thinking a lot about thresholds lately so this resonated with me on a much deeper level than my epidermis. I have always associated thresholds with transition but ironically, a threshold is more of a point of entry, among other things. And this morning it seemed symbolic. The zit would go away, as they always do. And much to the contrary of the many skin care influencers out there, the wrinkle will not. And I am ok with that. This is my threshold into my later years. It kind of makes me want to have a party. A coming out of my younger self party. A don’t bother wearing the lacy boyshort thong knickers and just wear the boy shorts instead party.

While not “young” anymore, I am certainly not “old”, and like our adolescent children, I find myself straddling two worlds. Theirs being leaving childhood behind while forming their future identities apart from us. Mine is leaving behind my youth and formerly perky backside, while trying to age as gracefully as I can manage. Lately though I have felt much closer to being old than to being young, often overhearing or participating in conversations with friends over various ailments; arthritis, not being able to drink more than a glass of wine now and again as the recovery time isn’t worth it, insomnia, snoring, digestive issues. And those are just the topics I bring up.

The dialogue changes but the underlying sentiment is the same; we are just getting older. Today I found myself having a conversation with a friend I have know for over 30 years and among other things, we talked about dishwashers. Really. And then laughed about what our 26-year-old selves would have to say about the boring old fogies we have become.

Like many who have prematurely lost friends or family, I embrace each year, each decade, each wrinkle as those that I have lost would give anything for the chance to have lived long enough to get age spots. But I am certainly not always this Zen about it. Some days I cuss (well, most days I cuss) when I walk into a room and forget why. Or can’t find my reading glasses. Not one of the 8 pairs that I own. Or can’t read the vitamin bottle dosage. Can anyone actually read a font that size?

But being married to someone who is always ready to be silly and have a laugh seems like a key component for me in perpetuating my own vitality.

It also feels like an important balance to achieve; getting older with dignity and grace while acknowledging the process needs tending.

According to Harvard Health Medical School Publishing, over the age of 40 there is a decline of 1% to 2% per year in lean body mass and 1.5% to 5% per year in strength. So clearly this means we need to work on our strength training. Most of us have also heard that balance is vital to maintain as we get older but not because our body loses the ability to balance, but because most people over the age of 60 who eat a typical Western diet will be having “ministrokes”, which can go on to disrupt connections in our brain that are like the air traffic controllers for the many aspects of our coordination. So there’s that.

So what does this all mean? This threshold, this transition. Honestly, I have no idea as since beginning the article I totally forgot what I even wanted to write. But for now, I will just say that while we each need to tackle this particular threshold in our own way, it does seem like we could do worse than steal some secrets from The Blue Zones by Dan Buettner. I have had the pleasure of hearing him speak a few times and the book is fascinating. If you haven’t read it, you should.

In a nutshell, a blue zone is a region in the world that has been identified as having a population that lives longer than average. In the book they concentrate on areas with the highest concentration of centenarians. All of the blue zones have certain lifestyle traits in common such as daily movement, ritual, sense of community, stopping their eating before they are 100% full, a large percentage of plant based cuisine and a sense of purpose. It’s interesting though, none of them mention botox, collagen, boot camp or eye creams. Just saying.

I will continue this series on thresholds and look forward to hearing everyone’s thoughts on the various topics we will be sharing over the course of this series.

Next up; Empty Nest Syndrome.